我想，想要打破別人對中國人的偏見，尤其是作為精緻的利己主義者的自己，想要和外國人平等相處的話，兩個認知條件是必不可少的：認識到哪些是中國文化（人）的特點；想要擺脫這些特點。

其後，便是膽量了。要在別人對自己使用偏見時表示自己並不接受，是需要勇氣的。

其中一個偏見，便是低自尊的謙虛；或者說“膽小、自私”。

書到讀時方恨⋯⋯晚。

這兩日竟然讀完了George Orwell的1984。讀到一半時我就有一種想要落淚的感同身受。沒想到一位1948年的英國作家能夠從納粹和共產兩個主義中幻想出下個百年的蘇聯和中國。

這本“小說”用很簡單的男女愛情故事串燒了一整套對於極權烏托邦社會架構的論述。稱其為小說，實在是不合適。此書應當作為政治學的基礎讀物。

閱讀這本書產生的興奮感和悲痛感，完全是來自於為這些論述與我過去二十年的生活經歷相吻合，正如閱讀一個準確而悲慘的預言一般。所以，讀完此書，不由得後悔二十年前未能讀此書，未能有這般政治覺悟了。當然，那時的我也不可能有生活經歷來作感同身受的原料了。

If there was hope, it MUST lie in the proles, because only there in those swarming disregarded masses, 85 per cent of the population of Oceania, could the force to destroy the Party ever be generated. The Party could not be overthrown from within.

…

There was a fresh outburst of yells. Two bloated women, one of them with her hair coming down, had got hold of the same saucepan and were trying to tear it out of one another’s hands. For a moment they were both tugging, and then the handle came off. Winston watched them disgustedly. And yet, just for a moment, what almost frightening power had sounded in that cry from only a few hundred throats! Why was it that they could never shout like that about anything that mattered?

Until they become conscious they will never rebel, and until after they have rebelled they cannot become conscious.

…

But simultaneously, true to the Principles of doublethink, the Party taught that the proles were natural inferiors who must be kept in subjection, like animals, by the application of a few simple rules.

Orwell, George. Nineteen Eighty-Four [1984] (p. 61).

似曾相識的驚喜和絕望。